Completeness

This post is dedicated to the women who were a beautiful example for me of living a life to its fullest; striving for completeness with the people that they loved; and inspiring me to see how there is a beauty, faith, and dignity even in how they take their final breaths.   Thank you AnnMarie, Judy, Marie, and Mina.  They are the reasons that I am honored to continue this work.

When I reflect back on 2011, I am in awe of all of the new people that I have met, the places that we have travelled, the lives that have been impacted and the dedication of the work of our volunteers.   I have a huge list of accomplishments that I could share about where we have come in just our first year or share the upcoming community events or list the new retreat dates.  But today, what I would like to do is something a little different.

The journey of Little Pink started for me with God giving me a purpose and making sure that every gift that would be needed to make his vision a reality come to life.  It never seemed simple and involved having a faith that I never imagined possible of my doubting self.  I was always a person who prayed, but usually because I wanted something or something seemed to be spinning out of control.  Rarely, did I put my full faith in God because I still believed that I had many of the answers- he could fill in when I could not do it on my own.  This past year has been a transformational year because I made a decision to truely have faith in the destination that he had planned- a place of service and love.   Talking about my beliefs has never been a place of comfort for me- but I am learning to trust God with that as well.  I often times try to explain to people that I feel like my journey with Little Pink is like having a front row seat to the goodness that exists in the world today.  I see the best in people- what moves them to give, serve, fight, love, dream, sacrifice, and be amazing!

"The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others," - Mahatma Gandhi


I have tried to keep a journal, but for some reason find myself forgetting to do it (that whole busy thing).  But I went back and looked at the journal for the entry that I made the night before the first retreat, it reads, "Is my body healing- I  don't know. Is my cancer really gone- Who can say?  But what I do know is that my heart is full, my faith is strong, and I am moving towards my definition of a cure- completeness in this life".  Thanks to everyone who has helped me see how to be a more complete person.  Thanks for letting me have a chance to serve.  And the biggest thanks of all to a God who carved out this work and continues to be in charge of the direction of Little Pink.   The vision became a reality this past year for so many families, volunteers, and people in the community.  My wish for the New Year is to listen, follow and enjoy the view from the front row seat.

Handprints on my Heart

It well may be  
That we will never meet again  
In this lifetime  
So let me say before we part 
So much of me 
Is made from what I learned from you  
You'll be with me  
Like a handprint on my heart  
And now whatever way our stories end 
I know you have re-written mine  
By being my friend...
"For Good"  

Today I am so clearly aware of the handprints on my heart placed lovingly and gently by each mother, father, child, and volunteer who have been a part of a Little Pink retreat and that I now consider part of my family.   

Three of our beautiful moms have been struggling with the final part of their journey over the past three weeks in hospice care.  One of our moms died late tonight.  She had a spark, a smile, a laugh that was infectious.  She has an amazing 9 year old son full of life, a husband that adores her.  Tonight my heart wraps around them, holding them tight.  

I spent the afternoon with another Little Pink friend, beautiful M.  Her hand so soft, her heart so loving, her body so tired.  Before she ever came on her retreat with her wonderful husband, we spoke of the idea of healing and we both agreed that healing was not about just fighting the rogue cells in our bodies, healing is about finding completeness in our lives.   Finding a completeness in every part of your life- your faith, your family, your purpose, your friends, your spirit.  She has lived beautifully and completely.  Tonight my heart wraps around her husband to help support him as he loves her through it.  


And our dearest A.M. continues to show her strength as she holds on to the ones that she loves.  She has an amazing spirit and a husband who adores her each and every day with an excitement like they are still newlyweds.  Tonight, my heart wraps around them both as the manage to find peace and comfort.


But all three of these women came into my life with purpose and meaning.  I have been changed forever by being their friend.  There is a richness that they have brought to my life that is inexplicable.  That all of our families have brought to my life.  And so tonight, my arms wrap around my husband and my son and the memories that we have as a family of these beautiful mothers, husbands, and children.  For tonight, we are truly blessed for being able to call them part of our family.